You Had to Be There

 

Back in the day, you had to finish you peas before you could do the dishes, before you could sit down in front of the television for the only good thing on: TGIF on ABC. Life was simpler back then, and the movies you watched on Friday nights while sipping on your lemonade-sippy cup were about talking parrots named Paulie.

My older brother had, and to this day has, the uncanny ability to memorize funny movie lines and then regurgitate them at any given moment. A trait that, to this day, I get a lot of pleasure out of. 

Paulie: They talk. 

Ignacio: [Referring to his supposedly talking parrots] They can't talk. I say 'taco', they say 'taco' 

Parrots: Taco, taco, taco. 

If you are reading this and not peeing your pants out of laughter it's probably because you did not have the pleasure of sitting around my dinner table in 1998. We, as in the dozen of us children, sat around our table saying this over and over and over. To the very clear disinigration of my mother's sanity we repeated every line and then giggled hysterically. I mean, who comes up with this stuff? It's golden. 

My mom declared the next person to repeat those words would get a spanken. Silence insued for a possible split second before it was too much and Eric mimiked three tiny-teensy parrot voices and then we all squealed with laughter before the smack-down ensued. My mom is a saint, but even Mother Theresea couldn't have tolerated our nonsense. 

Days like those I think back on once in a while and I smile. The most random memories that stick with you make a person. I often wonder what of my time here I'll think back on and remember. Really remember, you know, like vividly enough to feel the laugh-ache in my stomach and looking at my sisters red-faced and snorting, clapping their hands over their mouths in order not to let a single giggle out, lest we be punished. It was worth it. 

It was worth it. It was also raining enough for me to think that Germany may have a monsoon season. But we went anyway. I got a scholarship to go and study here so I better slog through the rain and clap and smile and listen to the speeches and look nice, even dripping wet, for the pictures that would not even get put up on the web site because, honestly, who wants to look at this while they considering donating to a scholarship fund?

The sad puppy face always gets more money.

But we laughed so hard. There was an improv theater after all the hauety-tautey run around the show finally got on.

Just like I giggle every time I hear the word 'taco' repeated I will forever have a fond place for 'apple sauce' in my heart. It's hard to describe since it was almost totally in German, so I'll leave it. Let's just say it went along with apple sauce, Cognac, Gwyneth and the newest fitness program out of the USA. Plus I got a free book and that stylish bag dripping water on the floor in my picture. 

Now, I need to get going because I am being called down to eat tacos...Irony, thy name is my life.