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Did you know how much money you can make in college by just walking into the psychology buidling? Well, none. But if you check out the posting boards there you'll catch my drift. In my first two years I almost had to hold back from doing so many experiments and surveys in oder to not have to declare them on taxes. Earn five dollars just by answering a ten minute survey? Don't mind if I do! Ka-ching.

I was also so fortunate as to have ran one or two of my own surveys and experienments thanks to an undergraduate research opportunity, so I can honestly say how important it is to help those people out. Hence the nagging little habit of doing every survey or questionaire that pops under my nose. Because for someone, somewhere, that research is important.

 Since my program here is college-ran we had to attend a formal 'prepping' by the school in order to 'prepare us for the upcoming experience' and basically make sure we were all mentally stable enough to enter another country without too much hand-holding. We got surveys there asking us related questions of our home life, what we want to learn, how well we think we'll strive through obstacles, blah blah blah, and oh by the way, how many uses for a brick can you think of excluding a paper weight? (Got about thirty, but I don't know how well they'll take the 'Portable self-defence mechanism' answer.)

The follow-up survey came in my e-mail earlier this month and I've been nawing on some of the questions ever since. One has really stuck to me because I pondered it myself quite often: What have you learned about yourself during your abroad experience?
Short answer: Uhmm... a lot?
 But I think that's neither acceptable nor helpful. Here's what I've come up with.

I learned my definition of home is not wholly normal. This is kind of cheating, because an early question asked if you felt you assimliated well to your host culture. I do. I also felt a little ashamed to be an American citizen in some situation but, hey, quess what? They asked that on the survey too, so maybe, just maybe, I'm not a complete nutjob. Maybe just a little one, like a cashewjob instead of a hazelnutjob. I feel very much at home with both countries but neither do I feel especially connected to. That was a weird revelation because it's not as though the heavens opened up and a music played and a bright light spoke to me and said, ''ASSIMILATE!'' It was a bit more subtle. Hard to explain.

I learned that I'm not as anti-social as the states made me out to think. One thing straight. I am not a drinker, I am not a partier, and I have maybe two or three friends. Whew. Got that off my chest, now go ahead and finish your name calling and move on with the show.

Honestly, how many Americans are actually ashamed to tell people you don't drink? You feel like a recovering closet alcoholic. People are all, 'Oh, you don't drink? Is it okay if I drink?' Like their going to tempt me into remission.

 True story, I just don't care for it and that's just me. I was fairly surprised to find that there are people like me and that they're German. Because for all the hype about Germany=beer. It's not that big of a deal here to drink. It's a glass or two at dinner and that's about it. It's trashy to drink outside (albeit legal) and before four pm. This is intensified by another one of my quality-traits that most people don't have a lot of friends.

For this to make sense, I need to define a German friend. A friend in German means life-long and complete trust. They just prefer to have a few, three or four, close friends instead of a facebook full of them. We actually learned in a class about how there are different words in German for your level of aquantence-ness with that person and it takes a lot of getting to know someone before you even call them a 'friend.' Plus side? Apparently it saves a lot of money on party invitations when a wedding is always only close family and friends.

I learned all about how my actions have consequences and that no matter where you go you are an ambassador for your country, state, town and family. By coming to Germany, I inadvertently brought two of my sisters, my parents, and my grandparents with. Everyone I met here learned about how my American life is and made a stereotype of America from me. I don't know how much America I brought with me or how much German I'll take back. Time will tell.

I learned to chill out and live in the moment. Without a doubt I have mellowed in my old age. In all, I just learned a lot about myself and who I want to be, who I am, and who I am definately NOT. What I still need to figure out is want to do and whose rules do I need to follow to get there.

I also learned I am terrible at calling home.