Das Perfekte Dinner

Back home in Ann Arbor I did not own a television set but rather we --myself and two roommates-- had a monitor that they would hook up to an Xbox and play while I watched. The benefits of living with guys never end. The most television I watched so far in my college (entire) life would have probably been during the month long, mind you free, trial we did of Netflix. Trying to squeeze out the most of it, during the final weekend we watched an entire cartoon tv series.
I know, I am possibly the lamest college student alive, but hey, at least I didn't eat Ramen Noodles every day, right?
My host family in Germany does, in fact, have a television (It's beautiful and big and shiny and new!) and we watch it regularly...As in every night... As in I am semi-addicted to a German reality show that consists of people cooking for one another and hence my title.

It's not particularly interesting, nor intelligent, mostly I am just proud to understand it all because once we switch it up to the news I've got my sixth grade comprehension level to fall back on. Something of note here is that every week a TVguide comes in the mail (Those still exist?) and one might wonder, "Why does Germany keep sending out guides?"
Well, dear readers, it is probably because Germany has the most messed up confusing scheduling ever. Ever. Their shows do not have starting times on the hour, or the half hour, or any sort of normal hour-ish time. Sometimes movies will begin at seven after the hour and because the Germans are so punctual it is exactly four hundred and twenty seconds after the hour.
Then they just split into these wonky twenty minute commercial segments which are completely useless for the kid who has learned to sprint to the bathroom, use said room, brush teeth, and get into pajamas within the four-and-a-half-minute break between our tv shows because I'll be damned if I'm missing any precious second of Red and Green Show!
Not only are these commercial breaks way too long for any normal human being, since they are generally American tv shows adapted to German, the commercials will break mid-way through sentences.
Because we in the states have tv figured out! Five minute commercials at carefully spaced plot points to keep viewers coming back, not DIRECTLY in the middle of the show because there is only one commercial break total.

Trust me, watching Horatio Caine take of his sunglasses to a witty remark revolving around murder is not nearly as dramatic if it doesn't immediately cut to commercial.  And that *takes off sunglasses* is all I have for today. YEEAAH!
(Edit: Sorry, if you didn't get that last part, just watch an episode of CSI:Miami.)