All's Fair in Fasching

Christmas Eve at my house always brought a visit from Santa Claus. It's a mystery, I know, chalk it up to Christmas magic. One year as we were waiting for him to show up and bring the presents already, the big man surprised all of us kids on the couch by banging on the bay window. One of my brothers started off sitting on the arm of the couch and ended in the lap of another screaming like a howler monkey. Moral of the story: Santa is terrifying to small children.
Now imagine swapping out Jolly Ol' Saint Nick with this:

 My question is how are very small German children not sobbing in terror for the whole six week period of the Fasching season? I attended my first Fasching parade Monday in Horb and it was enough for me. I can't imagine how these people put up with it for so long. I learned that there is at least one parade in a week and all the same things happen every time:
The parade begins and there's a chant the crowd says. It sounds something like Naho, Haribo! I have no idea what I was shouting, but I learned that if a witch comes up to you and you aren't shouting it's like wearing a fanny-pack target on your back. Groups of people dress up like as many horrifying things as they can think of,

Like cheese

run through the streets with... Christmas tree wrappers. Yep. With netting and everything...

Yeah, I saw a kid get thrown in there. He came out like a prepackaged turkey.

buckets of confetti to dump people into and then shove it down their clothes....

The girl this happened to was putting paper slips out of her coat a week later.

 Stocks...

Think 1700's and you've got it.

Or, as weapon of choice these witches chose pig intestines blown into balloons with which they would hit people with. Repeatedly. Until the "balloon" popped.

That's sanitary, right?

Mostly they just run up to unsuspecting girls and...

steal their shoes and throw them over powerlines

put them in cages,

Then spin it.

 pin them to the ground...

and then sandwich them and roll away with them down the street..

There is a girl in there. I swear. The loch ness monster covered her up.

 I pretty much feel like I saw it all. Thankfully only one girl from Michigan got it bad. The worst that happened to her (other than confetti down the shirt, hair musings and being picked up) was being drug into the street and thrown over someones shoulder while being spanked with a rubber paddle. This all happened while I cowered in fear. She didn't mind it though, right Johanna?

Fill in the blank.

 And I was terrified. Even the children were braver than me. There was a two year old next to me in the street waiting politely for some not insane witch to come by and give him some candy (he got an egg.) and one of the witches came up close to him probably trying to steal him he look at her/him and bellowed, "Nein!" and punched the witch in the leg.

Take out his kneecaps!

 That's how the two-year-old deals with a mean witch. I'll try that tactic next time.
Or not.

They gave him back. ...I think.

The biggest conundrum is why this is so acceptable? No one fights it or even acts like they dislike it. They all go along with it and even pay money for it! (It costs two euro to see the parade.)

I guess I shouldn't complain because I made out pretty good. I learned that the witches will steal your hat (I wasn't surprised after that.) So I used it for a bucket and caught candy with it.

 I think I made out pretty good.
Sorry about the long post, but I thought it was interesting to share and more honestly, I wanted you guys to believe me when I say that the Germans here are a little crazy.